smorg

No, seriously…

Paris Hilton is calling on her fans to help her stay out of jail - by endorsing an online petition they can sign. The desperate socialite, who was sentenced to serve 45 days in jail last week after violating terms of her 2006 drink-driving arrest, has teamed up with a pal called Joshua to urge fans to help her. In a post on her MySpace blog, Hilton, who is also asking California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger to pardon her, writes, “My friend Joshua started this petition. Please help and sign it. I love you all!”.

The petition, which is addressed to Schwarzenegger, claims “the American public who support Paris are shocked, dismayed and appalled by how Paris has been the person to be used as an example that drunk driving is wrong. She provides hope for young people all over the US and the world. She provides beauty and excitement to (most of) our otherwise mundane lives. If the late former President Gerald Ford could find it in his heart to pardon the late former President Richard Nixon after his mistake(s), we undeniably support Paris Hilton being pardoned for her honest mistake as well.” Hilton is due to start serving time by June 5 if her appeal fails, after being sentenced at a hearing at Los Angeles Superior Court on Friday.

Poor Paris, being held up to the world as a common criminal! And to be made an example of when she SHOULD be doing her work of convincing young girls that being a drug addled tramp is the true, one path.

I hope she gets shanked in jail. But then again, if she is, it will complete the Holy Trinity of Diana, Ann-Nicole and Paris that was prophesied in the Old testament.