smorg

Earlier, I was talking to Andy on iChat, and was telling him about making dinner earlier, and about enjoying cooking.

I wrote:

I love to cook. the timing, the pressure, the presentation at the end, the satisfied sounds of people enjoying it. it’s like sex, but messier.

I hate to toot my own own horn, but that’s pretty freaking funny. Of course, ‘drew brings out the funny in me every time…

If only I could make a living out of being a smartass. Sigh.

Police use stun guns on greased, naked student

WESTERVILLE, Ohio (AP) — A high school lunch period was disrupted Monday by a greased, naked student who ran around screaming and flailing his arms until police twice used a stun gun on him, authorities said.

Taylor Killian, 18, had rubbed his body with grapeseed oil to keep from being caught, and got up after the first time he was shocked to continue running toward a group of frightened students huddled in a corner at Westerville North High School, Lt. Jeff Gaylor said.

“That prank went a little farther than he intended, I guess,” Gaylor said.

Officer Doug Staysniak was monitoring the lunch period when Killian, with long hair and a full beard, ran in the room toward students, who screamed and ran away. The officer is normally assigned to a middle school and did not recognize Killian as a student, Gaylor said.

Police said that an administrator ordered Killian to stop, but that the student made a sexual gesture and kept running.

Killian is in jail and charged with inducing panic, public indecency, resisting arrest and disorderly conduct. A message seeking comment was left at Killian’s home.

School officials reported that Killian was a good student, Gaylor said. There was no indication of substance abuse or a medical problem.

Back in the old days (ya know, the late 80’s), the kid would be given detention, maybe suspended. Now he’ll end up in jail. What kind of world do we live in where you can’t run naked through a cafeteria? I blame it on television (TEE-VEE, Andy).

Plucky duck survives another brush with death - CNN.com

:)

TALLAHASSEE, Florida (AP) — Perky is one tough bird.

The ring-neck duck survived being shot and spending two days in a hunter’s refrigerator — and now she’s had a close brush with death on a veterinarian’s operating table.

The one-pound female duck stopped breathing Saturday during surgery to repair gunshot damage to one wing, said Noni Beck of the Goose Creek Wildlife Sanctuary.

Veterinarian David Hale revived the bird after several tense moments by performing CPR.

“I started crying, ‘She’s alive!”‘ Beck said.

Perky entered the headlines last week after a hunter’s wife opened her refrigerator door and the should’ve-been-dead duck lifted its head and looked at her. The bird had been in the fridge for two days since being shot and presumed killed January 15. (Watch Perky after her first survival feat Video)

Perky is recovering with a pin installed in the fractured wing, and probably will not have more surgery because of her sensitivity to anesthesia, Hale said.

On my Google home page (www.google.com/ig), I have a CNN headline feed added. When you click the + in front of the article, it expands to show a story preview.

I think there may be a problem somewhere down the line.

and finally…

Ain’t technology grand?

Ok, this is it. One question that will decide if you are worthy of breathing our precious oxygen.

There is a mute who wants to buy a toothbrush. By imitating the action of brushing one’s teeth, he successfully expresses himself to the shopkeeper and the purchase is done.

Now, if there is a blind man who wishes to buy a pair of sunglasses, how should he express himself?

Think about it first before looking below for the answer…

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He opens his mouth and says, “I would like to buy a pair of sunglasses”.